Sunday 27th April 2014
Sunday was the last day of the party and the main event is always the Boat Cruise in the evening. Last year I was down to attend but was ill, but after hearing it was freezing cold I was glad I didn’t go. Besides I am no water baby and was unsure how choppy it would be. Luckily it was a calm evening so I’m sure everyone had a whale of a time! 🙂 hee hee
I think we all so tired because we all slept in until almost noon. I got up and saw on my phone the time and was down to go to the ‘Little’s party’ at 2pm which I was really excited about, so I crept into the bathroom and had a shower. By the time I was out the other girls were waking too, which was just as well because we were all going to the Little’s party anyway.
I decided to wear one of my normal everyday dresses. I always wear dresses and skirts anyway and at no time during the entire BBW event (aside from when I wore my school uniform), did I wear anything that I don’t wear at home most times so I didn’t need to dress up at all for it. I usually wear flat shoes and most times my white ankle socks with a dress, after getting blisters on my toes a lot out walking in Australia and being reminded that I need to wear them. I do dress up in heels if it’s something like going out to a posh restaurant for dinner or a role play scene where I’m a secretary or French maid or something, or at work where I need to wear an office suit, or just to be sexy for someone whatever!…but at home and casually outdoors I always dress as you see in all my ‘vanilla’ pictures, it is just how I am. It was always so tiring and draining to dress to impress so now I wear what I feel most comfortable in, so I am pretty teenage and ‘little’ like to some I guess in my dress style.
I took three of my teddy bears from the UK with me to the Little’s party (Jemima, Juni and Harriet) and Pandie and Emrys both had their own stuffies, and I also had Booshki the panda that I had been looking after for Pandie there. I took my coloring books and pencils too and we did some coloring, listened to a story and had fun making a fort in the middle of the room. Somebody had an idea to squirt all the Big’s and teachers and carers with water pistols, so we all got spanked for that but it was fun tunneling our way in and out of the fort through the chairs! I loved being there and for one of the first times I did not have to pretend to act big or try and impress anybody, I could relax and have fun and not care and every big person was so lovely and kind and helpful. When we were packing up after the event I couldn’t find my coloring book. It was one my former Daddy had got for me and posted to my home address from Australia. I cried and panicked and called Miss Chris and she helped find it. Another nice man Mr Wood was really helpful too and nice when I was upset and I liked him but I never saw him again. I was genuinely upset emotionally when I lost my book, it means a lot to me because it was a present at a time that meant a lot. Miss Lisa was very nice and kind too when I was upset, and I loved seeing my UK friends there who I have missed and never spend enough time with. One of my friends who I saw in the UK a while before BBW upset me, when he said my teddy bears are just stuffed toys and I shouldn’t care about them so much and that one Domme he knew used to practice caning on them types of toys. It upset me and I told him I actually hated her now for doing that, but I meant it and it made me angry and I even cried to imagine her being so nasty. I also thought he was teasing me and really did not know or understand me at all and that upset me, but he was just thinking and being like most people do towards me I guess, and he probably thought I was mad or some attention seeking age player. My bears are like family to me and I would never sell them or lose them ever. Nobody realises how much it means to me to have these small things I never had once before, so the Little’s party was one of the best things I went to. I didn’t want to be or care if nobody spanked me or was looking for an excuse to, I just was happy as a bunny to be there that day. I am not a baby ‘little’ type in Fetish or ‘scene’ terms but I have a huge immaturity ‘problem’ (so I was told by someone who never understood) that I have written about a lot and given up explaining now, but I relate to being an older teenager type still in real life and it is how I am every day just by being myself so it’s a battle. Anyway, sorry to bore anybody, I will get back to the party!
Bertha and Emrys both had to leave today and I was sad. I wished they could have all stayed but they had things to go back to. Bertha left first and we all hugged and I was so glad she was there and became my friend and as I write this I think of her face and miss her. We had a nice chat one day and she said some lovely kind things that I will remember. Later on Emrys had to leave so I helped her with her bags and we said goodbye in the hotel exit area. I really like Emrys, she is warm and genuine and says what she feels and I admire her strength a lot. I had a few tears, as I did when Bertha left but as soon as Emrys went and I walked away I realised she had the room key! I quickly ran back and caught her just in time and got it.
In the late afternoon, I was on my own most of the time as everyone was going to the cruise. When I went back to the hotel room I tried the key Emrys had given me and it didn’t work. I decided to go to the Landshark restaurant and just had a nice burger and chips and it was a bit cold but I couldn’t get into the room to get a jacket. A few hours later I saw Pandie and she had the other key and let me in. She said the key I had was cancelled as there was a lost one, so I guess that was it, panic over!
Later in the evening was the final chance to play in the suites, but it was an earlier night as I had to go home the next day. I had an awesome spanking from one of my bestest female friends (which is a rare thing for me to be spanked by another girl, when its not in a film) but I feel particularly close to her and we have been friends for years but seem to keep passing like ships in the night, and I admit making the most pathetic excuses to stay away from her in the past and I regret not being there. There is just something about her that totally gets to me and draws me in I cannot explain why, but I miss her. I also had a wonderful spanking and bath brushing from someone I actually asked to play with, which was a first! I was feeling low and upset as I had also lost an earring, which amazingly turned up on the table in his suite when I was there later, so when he said “yes” to taking me back there and spanking me I was made up. He never saw my crossed fingers behind my back when I asked him and held my breath! It was wonderful and special and he knew how to deal with me perfectly in that moment. I loved it afterwards when I thought about it happening, even though at the time it hurt in the real way I need, but he dealt with it.
The following day (Monday) I flew back and my friend Cindy kindly offered to drop me off at the airport, which meant I got to spend a whole day at her house beforehand. It was wonderful to be with such a good friend on such an emotional final day and not have to sit for 8 hours alone in an airport which is very lonely. We said goodbye at the airport and I cried most of the way home. BBW was more special this year and I will never forget it, but I came back happier than I had been in a long time.
Thanks to everybody who included me, made me feel welcome, became a new friend, shared skittles and poptarts with me, or indulged or humored me when I was not always at my best. I am sorry If I upset anybody by not saying ‘yes’ to playing with them again after last year, but that is because I am more aware of myself and my reasons for doing things (like ‘play’) and not because you are not wonderful friends I like socially. To all those I did play with: Thanks for making it fun, for occasionally pressing the right buttons and taking me to the brink of overstaying my welcome across your knee or bed, and for making me think about being braver in telling you how hot it really was for me…hmmmm…I doubt I will ever be that brazen but I hope you could tell by my reactions and that I want to see you again. 🙂 xx